Saturday, July 27

Erratic


Why do we need feelings for? To cherish someone we love? Or get hurt because of a broken-heart? Teenage hormone sucks to the core. An emotionless person would be fun, you dont need to cry, laugh, mad, be jealous, egoistic & etc. I wish i could be in that kind of situation. I'm done being a nice, two-faced person. i have to carve a smile just to hide my anger and sadness. what can i do, i cant please everyone to understand my needs and problems. sleeping away the pain always do the trick. its good that i can't stay mad at an individual for a long time and forget abt it after a while. some just kept it to themselves and remembered for eternity also holding grudges. i feel... sorry for them but its just how they were made. Although i'm 16 but i felt like i'm 56 cause i've been through a lot. Maybe all those circumstances made me learn more about others personality and how to approach or what to say to them.

Time and era change. its the 21st century, more maturity all around us and high fashion where teenagers are crazy and craving for it. Serious talk, all those fashion leads us (teenagers) to become a lady in ASAP. Can you imagine a 16 year old teen can have a face/height of a 26? Cause i get that a lot. Not actually 26 but 21/22? One of the main reason was how we dressed up at any occasion. Adults dont understand how we have to face at this kind of era where every branded or ordinary stores sells the best outfit. To them, wearing a nice long jubah with a scarf would do. But a no no for us... For me i couldnt resist watching till i grab/own them.

Have you ever wonder how lonely you can be during late nights? Its like every night i'm facing the next phase of life which is; death. These kind of time i could remember my past behaviour that i regret, sweet memories, things tht i shouldnt done, really well. More to a slideshow infront of my closed eyes. Countless sins and a little amount of good deeds; let Allah be the judge of it. Shivering and tears streaming down imagining how hell would look like. Keep in mind, everything we had/have is always temporary. 

Salam Ramadhan.